


Loki needs his coffee

by orphan_account



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Freezes Tony's tongue, Gen, He keeps getting kicked out of Starbucks, Loki needs coffee, Loki really really needs coffee
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-06
Updated: 2015-01-06
Packaged: 2018-03-06 07:33:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 603
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3126233
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Who says gods don't need coffee? Especially gods who work double time as villains. Loki's daily hassle of trying to get coffee, and having to go through elaborate disguises to get it. One-Shot.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Loki needs his coffee

**Author's Note:**

> PROMPT: Loki is just trying to get his Starbucks fix.   
>  DISCLAIMER: I do not own the characters in this fic, only my words.

Trying to be inconspicuous when you're a norse god isn't easy. It gets even harder when you tried to take over the world a couple of times and pretty much everyone knows who you are. But even godly villains need their daily coffee.

Walking down the street to Starbucks the first time, he naively wore a simple disguise, a jacket and black jeans with a beanie covering his hair, that he'd cut short a few days ago. Blending into the crowd on the street was easy seeing as how many people there were.

The aromatic scent of coffee floated throughout the shop as he entered quietly. Walking up to the counter, he glanced at the menu for a couple of seconds, the person behind it clearly to enamoured with their phone.

"I'd like a Vanilla Latte please." His British accent was polite and the girl glanced up only for her eyes to widen. He cursed himself. Well of course she knew who he was. He could either run or wait… Running meant leaving with no coffee. He opted for a nervous smile. Then she called the Avengers and he sighed. There was nothing to do but wait he supposed. As soon as Iron man, or Tony Stark entered the cafe he took one look at Loki and laughed.

"That's a disguise!? Dude, try a little harder, anyway, shoo shoo now. You can't have coffee here today." Glaring at the infuriating man, he walked towards the door, muttering profanities under his breath. Tony poked his tongue out at him on his way out and he froze his tongue with a wave of his hand, eliciting in a whack on the back of his head. No matter. There was another Starbucks a few streets away.

This time, he upped his disguise as Iron man had suggested and considered changing his hair colour to blonde. Then wearing a hoodie and headphones this time, he ventured out, also wearing sunglasses to see if that would help. Walking into Starbucks again, he almost got away with it, but he wanted to order a pastry and in order to see the menu he had to take his shades off. Resulting in Natasha coming in this time and pushing him out the door.

"Nice disguise. But what's with shades in Winter? And, no offence, but blonde isn't your colour." Gritting his teeth, he walked out the door.

He was getting irritated without his coffee, and he couldn't resist any longer. He donned an elaborate illusion and stalked out the door, a dangerous scowl on his face. Walking right up to the counter, he curtly ordered a Long Black, doing nothing to give himself away. Finally, he had his coffee, practically running out the door, he sipped it slowly, revelling in how relaxed it made him. He was so out of it he bumped right into the Avengers out on a stroll.

Tony scrutinized him for a moment then laughed. "So you finally got your coffee!"

"No thanks to annoying people who think their doing more good than harm." Natasha rolled her eyes.

"Surely it wasn't that bad." Loki sniffed huffily, and walked past, still drinking his coffee.

"Oh yes, the lack of coffee kept me from doing anything particularly drastic but now I'm back to normal, you'd better watch your backs."

Bruce considered that statement for a moment then smiled brightly. "So all we have to do to keep you from destroying the city is to keep you from coffee!" Loki's eye twitched slightly and he glared at the smiling scientist.

"Don't you dare keep me away from my coffee."

**Author's Note:**

> AN: Haha, another funny one. I swear I'll upload a songfic that I've been working on soon. My beta hasn't checked this one, and I have attempted to use paragraphs! She'll probably change it and make me upload it again ^^'. Please please review!


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